Year: 2013

FRANK MAYO: Stuck in China

Posted on: May 2, 2013 by frankmayo
Categories: Distractions
Tags: American Psycho, Baiju, Beijing, BuzzFeed, Cherokee Hair Tampons, China, Chinese, Chou Doufu, English, Frank Mayo, Prozac, Rebecca Martinson, VPN

Yeah, I’m stuck in China. Some of you may wonder where the hell I have been for the past year or so, most of you don’t give a shit. Needless […]

Rebecca Martinson for SGA President at UMD

Posted on: April 23, 2013 by thirstyturtletimes
Categories: Opinion, Thirsty Turtle Times Historical Archives
Tags: #CuntPunt2013, Annapolis, Cunt, Cunt Punt, CuntPunt, Delta Gamma, Maryland, Maryland DG, Noah Robinson, Punt, Rape Culture, Rebecca Martinson, Sam Zwerling, Samantha, SGA, SGA President, University of Maryland, Wallace D. Loh

Editor’s note: start here. If you just opened this link expecting it to be a fun parody with a healthy agenda, tape that goddamn smile in place because this endorsement […]

University of Iowa Basketball Player Arrested For Trying to Harvest the Chrysler Building

Posted on: April 10, 2013 by thirstyturtletimes
Categories: "News", College, Nation, Sports, Thirsty Turtle Times Historical Archives
Tags: ABC News, Atlantic Coast Conference, Baylor University, Big Ten, Chrysler Building, CIA, Corn, Dr. Wallace D. Loh, FBI, fynanseers, harvest, Hawkeyes, Hurricane Sandy Relief Shelter, Iowa, Islamo-facism, Madison Square Garden, MSG, National Invitation Tournament, New York City, NIT, NYC Criminal Court, shucking, University of Iowa, University of Maryland, Whitman Studley

The University of Iowa’s loss in the National Invitation Tournament has been blamed on the absence of stellar senior Whitman Studley, who missed the game while attempting to shuck the […]

Aux Armes! – An NRA Response to UMD President Loh’s Assault on the Second Amendment

Posted on: February 26, 2013 by thirstyturtletimes
Categories: Opinion, Thirsty Turtle Times Historical Archives
Tags: Alex Rane, aux armes, Biopsych, College Park, Dayvon Maurice Green, Dr. Wallace D. Loh, Duke riots, Governor Martin O'Malley, gun control, Gun violence, Hyattsville, Marcus Plummer, Maryland, mental health, National Rifle Association, NRA, propaganda, psychology, R.J. Bentley's, Thirsty Turtle Bar, Thomas Jefferson, Tree of Liberty, University of Maryland, Wallace Loh, Waynes LaPierre

Editor’s note: In light of College Park’s recent murder-suicide tragedy, the gun control debate has come to the University of Maryland. UMD President Wallace Loh penned a column in the […]