Author Archives: DenzelWashington

Entire Trump Administration Derailed by ‘Perfect’ Late-Night Comedy Joke

NEW YORK – The Trump Administration has come to a crashing halt, with all executive branch offices of the federal government vacated as of 8:00 AM Monday.  The apparent cause of the political thunderbolt was a totally “perfect” joke, delivered in the usual Wednesday evening broadcast of The Daily Show with Trevor Noah by the host, Trevor Noah.

By SKEWERING, DEMOLISHING, BURNING, TACKLING, DESTROYING, and EVISCERATING former President Trump for his blatantly racist and misogynistic views in a perfect zinger long sought by late-night comedians, that left several audience members dead from laughter-induced seizures, Mr. Noah finally put an end to the tyranny and recklessness of the Trump administration.

Former President Trump departed the White House on Marine One this morning, after a very brief statement.

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Local Gamestop Employee Tired of Gary Johnson’s Awkward Flirting

ALBUQUERQUE – Local Gamestop employee Anita Parker reported last Friday that she was growing sick and tired of former New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson’s awkward flirting and cheesy pickup lines, while working her afternoon shift at the new & used video game retailer.

The former Libertarian presidential candidate was reportedly attempting to resell a copy of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare I when he jokingly suggested to Parker that “girls don’t usually work in video game stores, I guess you’re one of the cool ones!”  

Parker also told reporters that Johnson expected up to $50 for the used game, in which he had saved progress under the username “SwallowMyJohnson.”

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