WASHINGTON – Jared Kushner, Senior Advisor to the president, has been relegated to eating his meals at the White House kiddie table. He now dines with Barron, President Trump’s youngest son.
Following the downgrading of his White House security clearance, Jared Kushner, the president’s son-in-law, was widely criticized for being privy to highly sensitive national security information for over a year. As an added precaution, White House officials decided he should not dine with the president or his staff.
“We do not generally comment on these national security machinations,” said White House Chief of Staff John Kelly. “But in regards to Jared, I can confirm he’s been assigned to the Fisher-Price department.”
Last year, Mr. Kushner was assigned to lead Middle East peace negotiations. He is reportedly frustrated with yesterday’s move to the kiddie table, especially after listening to Barron talk uninterrupted about Call of Duty: Modern Warfare for over an hour.
John Kelly was not seen dining with the First family. But from somewhere in the White House, howling laughter echoed through corridors.
The Ghost of Sean Spicer contributed to this report. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org